I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. I don't really know how I have time to think, as I spend most of my time busy and exhausted, but there have been certain things on my mind. I suppose it all started after writing the post about the
loneliness of motherhood. I haven't been myself for some time now, I can't remember when it started, and it comes and goes, but until yesterday I couldn't put my finger on what the problem was:
I thought I didn't have a safety net. I am one of those people who just gets on with things, I get up after only a few hours sleep, go to work, work hard, pick up the children, sort them out, put them to bed then sink down on the sofa, exhausted. I could see no way out, no let up, no escape. It all felt interminable, never ending and completely unrelenting.
So I did something I haven't done in years. I talked to my parents about how I felt. Yes there were tears, sobs, confessions and truths. And they were wonderful, they said they would help me and gave me a way out of the situation I'm in so I can follow my dream. I have truly awesome parents who love me and they will always be my safety net.
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| My awesome parents |
Must.stop.crying.
You're so lucky that you've got wonderful parents. They're absolutely lovely!
ReplyDeleteHope you're OK x
Thank you Mizue for your kind words. My parents are one in a million, I know I am very lucky and always have been. xx
DeleteI've always thought you were very lucky to have the lovely Davrils! This sounds very interesting, change of career? x
ReplyDeleteJane rather than a change I'm thinking no career!
DeleteWow, my dream career!!
DeleteI think you've made the right decision. There is no point working yourself into the ground just for the sake of it, I can't imagine how much relief you must feel! xx
I haven't made any definite decisions yet, but I really want to concentrate on writing for a while. We shall see!
DeleteYou're so lucky, people so often take their parents for granted x
ReplyDeleteThey do and I admit I did, but never again. Mine are pretty groovy and I should tell them so.x
DeleteMy Mum always says 'you never stop being a parent' and it's so true. All 3 of us are in our 30's now and throughout the ups and downs of life have turned to my parents in times of need. They are still my safety net - I don't tend to use it, but knowing they're there, unconditionally and would do anything to help me or support me is of great comfort.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful to have parents that you can turn to. I hope you feel happier soon. x
Thanks for your kind words. I've always prided myself on being independent, at least emotionally. But I think I've realised I'm not the Trojan I thought I was and actually need others sometimes.x
Deletemy parents were never my safety net, I'm more of a get on with it myself girl & they probably knew that. I find it hard to ask for help, so well done for doing so. Also lucky to have parents that listened & actually came up some help for you. Will you be a SAHM or a WAHM like myself?? Whatever you decide I wish you luck with it x
ReplyDeleteI am also one to stand on my own two feet and always have been. To be honest it would never even occur to me to ask for help until now, as I just can't manage.
DeleteI think I will take some time out to consider my options. I would love to write for a living but have no idea where to start!
Your parents are great Heather - bless the Davrils! My parents are also a great safety net. I know that whatever happens in life they will try their best to help and support me and its wonderful knowing that. Really I think your parents are the only people who will offer you unconditional love. I agree with one of the previous comments that being a parent never stops - I belive that too. I know my grandparents and my parents feel that and I really hope that I am able to offer my children the support they need too be they 6, 36 or 60! (Emma Perrott - for some reason I can only comment as anonymous!)
ReplyDeleteThanks Emma. I think it helps give you confidence in who you are and gives you a feeling of self worth. Too often as adults we can be very task focused and forget about what is important. Much as I love dressing in nice clothes I actually figured out recently that my idea of a perfect day is a walk in the country followed by a family bbq on a nice summers day. Hardly costs anything.
DeleteGlad you spoke to your parents. Like you I have some 'pretty groovy' parents who if I ask are only too happy to help (although I do feel guilty asking too often!) I'm glad you're getting the opportunity to try something different. I read your other post about the lonliness of motherhood, will not working mean that you're more isolated though? I started blogging for that very reason and because both of my children had started school. I find the online community quite comforting during the day. Good luck with whatever you do x
ReplyDeleteThanks. I think one of the reasons I feel lonely is because I am too exhausted to do anything or go anywhere because of working in the job I'm in. I'm hoping that this will give me a new lease of life and allow me to concentrate on my children and my writing. At the moment, I'm no good to man nor beast!!
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